March 28, 2009

Funny Infomercial Bloopers

Billy Mays, Anthony Sullivan and some old guy that throws up! It doesn't get any better than this. Yes, there are some slow-moving, self-serving sections of this 9 minute video since it was compiled by Anthony Sullivan himself (like you can't tell.....), BUT, there are a few gems that are worth watching....if you don't have the full 9 minutes, be sure to check out:

1:34 - Billy Mays gets mobbed for autographs (yeah...I think those are OxiClean employees, but still funny to see the behind the scenes look at the production)

1:51 - Billy grabs old lady with The Gopher

2:32 - If you ever thought Billy was smooth...wait til you see his 27 takes to "get it right"

8:01 - Old guy gets nervous and throws up...just to prove that it's not easy being "talent"

March 26, 2009

Sunday Paper

In case you're like 90% of America, and no longer subscribe to your local newspaper (at least in print form...), then you may not be aware that As Seen On TV products not only advertise on late night cable TV during re-runs of Walker, Texas Ranger, but many also advertise in the Sunday paper in the coupon section. Producing and airing a TV spot costs $40,000 and up, but running an ad in the paper can reach millions of people for less than $5,000. What this means to you and me is that there are lots of funny products in the paper that never make it on to TV. Here's a snapshot of a few favorites from the past few weeks:

Amish Mantle


Have you ever been to Amish Country? I went there a few times in Ohio, when I was a kid. I remember hearing rumors about how they all pitch in to help each other out. For example, when a new, young Amish family needs a barn, the whole community pitches in to build it by hand in a week or two. There aren't very many barns in Amish country, so I also wondered what else they do. No longer! They spend their time hawking furnace mantles to be sold by the thousands across the country. I'm not one to judge, but how do they test the furnaces to make sure they work before sending them out. Without electricity, they can't plug them in!
Then, what do they do with all the money rolling in? That one's easier to answer:

Pimp out their buggies:

Off-Road buggies for crazy Amish weekends:
Sexy Grandma Sweatsuit

Blair is basically the Victoria's Secret designer for the sexy 70+ crowd. Because you can't always take your blanket with sleeves when you occasionally leave the house, there's Blair. Seduce the older gentleman in your life by keeping him awake after 4pm then strutting your stuff in sexy "light blue," sultry "spearmint" or what's sure to be his favorite, plain "pink." He won't be able to keep his eyes off the flowery bling on your jacket pockets. "Your satisfaction is our guarantee"...if you know what I mean.


If you order today, we'll ship a free pair of pantaloons. Yeah, that's right...FREE!










You'll be landing men like this before you can say "how do I return this sweatsuit?"

March 25, 2009

Housewares Show


Earlier this week, they held the annual International Home & Housewares Show in Chicago. You HAVE TO attend this show if you want to see the latest ASOTV products and even famous personalities. You can get in for free...you just need to pre-register on their website. I will never miss this show...of course it's easy for me since I live down the street from the McCormick Convention Center, but you wouldn't believe how much fun you can have walking the show for a couple of hours. I met the owner of the Snuggie at the All Star Marketing booth. I got to see Vince Offer (The Sham Wow Guy) in person! I almost fainted.

Just 20 minutes later, I got to shake Billy Mays' hand! He was talking about his upcoming show with Anthony Sullivan on The Discovery Channel...an inside look at the world of infomercials. Can't wait!
Next year, be sure to plan a trip to the show. It's like the Oscars, only much cooler!


March 21, 2009

Designer Snuggie

Yes. You are reading correctly. The Designer Snuggie. If 1970 blue, 1960 green or Ocean Spray Cranberry didn't suit your style, then they now offer sexy Leopard Print, attention-grabbing Zebra Skin and one that I might actually buy if it didn't come with sleeves, Camel (http://www.designersnuggie.com/).


I looked around my place tonight to see what color blankets I have. I do have a red blanket for when I'm in a very good mood, a dark brown blanket for cold nights, and a navy blue left over from my undergrad days...but no zebra or leopard print...and no royal blue. I'm not sure if they should have called me for color advice, or if I'm the odd one. Are you with me on this one that their color selection is a bit odd? If so, then you are also odd, because millions of Americans are buying these things as fast as they're selling off their 401k investments...well, maybe as fast as we're selling off....I must admit, that I am intrigued by the "thicker, more luxurious fleece." Tell you what...I'll take one for the team and buy the camel one and let you know what I think in 4 to 6 weeks (I refuse to pay for rush shipping!).

See the spot at the link below:
http://www.designersnuggie.com/flare/next

March 20, 2009

Free iPod Contest

OK, I'm going to have a little fun for the next couple of weeks. I'm starting a contest to try and find cool or funny products to review on my blog. Please email links to interesting products that would make great infomercials to madi.keane@gmail.com. As soon as I get 100 or so entries, I'll pick a winner and share the product on this site. I'll send the winner a free iPod Shuffle 4GB (http://www.apple.com/ipodshuffle/). What can I say, I'm a sucker for Apple products, and I have a gift certificate...but too many iPods already...so I'm sharing with other As Seen On TV Fans!

March 19, 2009

Hawaii Chair

"If you can sit, you can get fit." Breaking a sweat to get fit is so 20th century! As they claim, this product "takes the work out of workout!" Ads like this also take the work out of trying to come up with funny copy about an infomercial. My favorite part is watching the office workers try to type while they are doing the hula dance. So you don't have to, I'm going to type the next sentence while actually doing the hula dance....y u gotttt l veee a tge wom,enbbvv ooiin tthge bi jkki nnuuiiiss@! (If you can decipher the sentence, then I'll give you credit on my next post for the whole world to see.)
You know, I take back all my negativism about this product. You really can get a good workout while typing at the computer. I apologize for my slander. My only leftover concern is the claim that this product works for people up to 300 pounds. It sure seems like they are leaving a big portion (no pun intended, I swear) of their perspective customers without an option. How are they supposed to get below 300 pounds to start working out with the Hawaii chair?

March 18, 2009

My %#@&$ Don't Stink!

Free! Odor Eliminator. Many products are funny. A few are useful. Free! Odor Eliminator (a.k.a. Poop Not Stink) is HILARIOUS, but still extremely useful, if you're willing to admit to being a user... I first saw this ad several months ago, and haven't been able to track it down until today. Here are the basic instructions:
1. Tear open packet
2. Pour contents into toilet
3. Put your "contents" into toilet
...and voila! It doesn't stink. I can't find this product on the market anymore, sadly, but it was a great help in my relationship....you know...for the man in my life...of course. If I can ever track the product down again, I'll post a link, because it really works...I couldn't believe it when I first ordered it...and....uh....had someone else try it out. I wonder if the product didn't sell well. I bet if they used the trademark "Va-Pooh-Rize" it would have sold like hotcakes...wait...that doesn't sound right. Well, this was the most difficult post yet, for obvious reasons, but check out the video and let me know what you think:
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March 16, 2009

Tracy Morgan and Jimmy Fallon in SNUGGIES

The Snuggies phenomenon continues...Friday night, March 13, Jimmy Fallon had his entire audience where Snuggies...and his band...and his GUESTS! Most of you haven't seen this video yet, but it's hilarious. Tracy Morgan is his usual, funny-man self, but the Snuggie makes it even funnier. He doesn't take his Snuggie off, even when Jimmy tells him it's ok. You can't buy better exposure than this!...unless you were to get a show with decent ratings to sport the Snuggie...(Today Show anyone???...of course you've seen that clip).

BUMMER! The video has been removed from YouTube due to copyright concerns (Snuggie concerns or Jimmy Fallon concerns???). Here's a link to the NBC video...it's one of the funniest interviews I've seen in a long time...definitely worth checking out the link:
http://www.latenightwithjimmyfallon.com/video/clips/tracy-morgan-part-1-31309/1061262/

March 12, 2009

New Spots of the Week

Wow! I knew it would be easy to post funny videos...but I honestly never imagined I would be able to find so many every week. This week, I found 6 new ads. Most are hilarious...a couple are pretty cool...see if you can tell how I feel about each one :)
Since we have so many this week, let me summarize:
1. End the recession by selling makeup to your friends.
2. Make disgusting looking egg creations...in MINUTES!
3. ShamWow mop, and it spins (for some unknown reason).
4. The Putter that takes all remaining exercise out of golf.
5. Another..."enhancement" product...but this one helps old guys date young girls.
6. Hardwood floor mop...I actually like this one...go figure!
_____________
1. OK, first off, I need to confess something before I continue this post. I think MLM/Network Marketing/Pyramid Scheme companies are a sham. If you disagree, then you probably won't think this video is funny, and should move on to the next spot. From the ad..."If someone asked me how to make money in this economy, I'd say Avon!" Bless her heart. She would only say "Avon" because if she signs up you and 10 of your friends, she'd make money off your backs...now get out their and sell makeup to all your soon-to-be-former friends! Maybe I'm just tainted because I've purchased so many wonderful products at "parties" that my "friends" keep throwing. I go to feel popular, which I do, but I stay because the live demos are often funnier than the best ASOTV ads! BTW, if you like this Avon ad, please contact me if you would like to learn how you can become rich selling makeup, cleaning products, health foods, jewelry, passion parties, financial services, real estate foreclosure properties and kids games.

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2. The Egg Genie. OK, do you ever see an ad that looks like it was run in 1981, and they just decided to dust off the tapes and try again in 2009? I swear this ad was shot 20+ years ago. I mean, if you're going to produce a new product in 2009, would you really use mustard yellow as your primary color? Also, in the 21st century, is it really that hard to make sure your eggs aren't completely raw when you put them on your toast (check out the "undercooked eggs..." demo)? I do have to say that the Bacon Wave does look very cool. I committed years ago to never underappreciate anything having to do with bacon, unless the bacon was pulled out of a turkey. If anyone would consider purchasing this product, please comment on this post...I really want to learn why!

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3. 360 Spin Mop. I must warn you that this spot is 5 minutes....please don't plan on going anywhere for a while after you hit the little triangle. You now know how I feel about bacon. I have similar emotions for hot dogs (I'm from Chicago, so please don't judge my eating habits). Putting hot dogs on a stick had to be one of the greatest ideas of the twentieth century. Putting a ShamWow on a stick? It's no corn dog, but it's a pretty cool idea. And it SPINS! I'm really not sure why it spins, but it does look cool. It also guarantees to cut my cleaning time in half. That sounds nice, especially since I have purchase 7 other DRTV products that also promised to cut my cleaning time in half...let's see....half of half of half......I should be able to clean in 0.8% of the time that it took my grandma. If you buy all the products I have, you too could clean your home before you're 3 seconds into the Spin Mop ad.

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4. Ultimate PickUp Putter. Yes, I am a girl. But...I also like to golf. I guess I picked it up in business school realizing that it would be a great way to network in the "men's club." I don't know if that's true, but my BodyBugg (www.bodybugg.com) tells me that I burn an extra 35 calories in a 4-hour round of golf. Even if I didn't enjoy walking around with a bag of sticks, I would do it just to maintain my girly figure. Wait a minute....now there's a product that will cut my golf calorie burn in half?!? Now I don't even need to bend over to pick up my balls? What will they think of next, little mini cars that you can drive around the golf course so you won't have to actually walk on beautiful sunny days? Yeah...ok, then they'll have built-in coolers in this "mini car" so you can take beer, soda and candy bars with you while you're burning your 35 calories? I'm starting to wonder if I should just go back to using my IronGym (www.getirongym.com) to lose weight...

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5. Old Man, Young Girls...with Progene! Did I say "girls?" Yes, I did. I know this particular cateogory of ads is inherently funny, but this ad is sure to become a classic. Here's the scenario, in case you're still getting the Internet over dial-up and don't have the patience to download this ad. Old men lose testosterone as they get older. As the testosterone goes, so goes the sex drive. But, if you swallow a few pills made out of who knows what, you are sure to score young women. Yes "women." In fact, this guy is with three girls in the ad. I have to admit that every time I sense testosterone in the room, I immediately look for the oldest guy in the room to flirt with. I don't think you'll see this premise in a Viagra ad...but who knows? In this economy, every week, companies are trying funnier and funnier ideas...

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6. Bona Hardwood Floor Mop. Warning. This spot is NOT funny. It's actually a pretty good product that I first tried about a year ago...it just looks like they have a new ad on TV. The host is also the Ace Hardware Helpful Hardware Guy. This is the type of inside scoop you simply won't find anywhere else. And, by the way, the product actually works. The only problem is that you can't spin it really fast in the ad....Comment and let me know if you like this mop or the Spin Mop better...(www.bonaclean.com)

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"The Ranking"

Every week, DRTV/As Seen On TV 2-minute ads are ranked by a couple of outside agencies. This is very cool. They are ranked based on total media spending for the week. You may be surprised by some of these. For the first week of March, the top ten spots were:
1. Extenze (www.buyextenze.com)
2. FinallyFast.com
3. Vibrating Tough (www.vibratingtouch.com)
4. Smooth Away (www.getsmoothaway.com)
5. Proactiv (www.proactiv.com)
6. Video Professor (www.videoprofessor.com)
7. 5-Hour Energy (www.5hourenergy.com)
8. NordicTrack Incline Trainer (www.nordictrack.com)
9. Alteril (www.buyalteril.com)
10. Perfect Pullup (www.perfectpullup.com)
____________
Some other interesting rankings....
13. Slim Clip (www.slimclip.com) - a money clip!?!
14. Slap Chop (www.slapchop.com) - from Vince Offer, the ShamWow guy
17. Prayer Cross (www.prayercross.com) - you have to check this one out!
30. Snuggie (www.getsnuggie.com) - still holding on!
49. EZ Comb (www.ezcombs.com) - I LOVE this product!!!

Can you predict what will be #1 in next week's ranking?

March 6, 2009

New Spots of the Week

I dug up some brand new ads that I'm sure you haven't seen yet...and probably won't see. As a service to you, I stayed up late watching TV every night this week, and found some pretty funny ads. Please don't tell my boss. LovRub is an...how do I say it...enhancement product for men and women. I will not be trying this product out, so please don't ask me for a review. But, I love the ad. It looks like it was shot by my cousin Stanley. Notice how they never really say what the product does...it's the exact opposite of nearly all infomercials, but I guess they don't have a choice when selling a product like this.

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My second favorite "New Spot of the Week" is Sleep Video. We all know that the healthiest way to fall asleep is to watch TV until you can't keep your eyes open anymore. Just to prove this point, I watched cable TV until 4am last night and finally dozed off during a re-run of Chuck Norris' "Walker, Texas Ranger"...or was it Chuck Norris' The Total Gym...I don't know. The only thing I know for sure is that I had some pretty crazy dreams about Chuck Norris before I woke up at 7am this morning, wide-eyed and ready to tackle the day. The Sleep Video helps ensure that you watch something relaxing until you can't keep your eyes open anymore. This one, I may just have try out...

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My final "New Spot of the Week" is "Secured Gold Buyers." The ad isn't really funny, but I think it solves the biggest problem with all the other gold buying companies. This company actually video tapes the person opening your package and weighing your gold so you know he's not pocketing your precious jewelry that you were so willing to send via First Class Mail to a random address in Duluth. Look for a post in the next few weeks, as I'm bagging up a gold bracelet that my high school boyfriend gave me...sorry Bobby! BTW, I just found the "I Hate the Snuggie Club" on Facebook. Very funny. How could you hate a blanket that comes with free sleeves?

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March 4, 2009

Billy Mays on Jay Leno

I'm normally quicker to catch things like this, but a couple weeks back, Billy Mays appeared on the Tonight Show with Jay Leno. It's a rare chance to catch Billy in his original, off-the-cuff ways. You can tell that a lot of this is unscripted, and that's where Billy's at his finest! Over the past 18 months, Billy Mays has had a lot of successes, and this is a fun way to see them all. If you've ever wondered what infomercials would be like if they were written by Shakespeare (which I wondered every time I fell asleep in my English Literature class in undergrad), this video link is the answer.

Billy Mays also did a promo video for "Livemercial," a consummate "DR" company. It's a spoof on The Office...which just happens to be my favorite TV show. What a perfect combination! This link hasn't gotten that many hits...it's a bit cheesy...but for people like us, there a few YouTube videos that are more appropriate. Perhaps more importantly, though the video isn't the funniest I've seen (nothing like the Tiddy Bear or the "In a Snuggie" music video from my previous entries), it satisfies my curiosity, if only slightly, to see what it would be like to work in one of the companies behind this glorious industry...I know this is a spoof, but if you pay very close attention, you can see some of the real work going on in the background. If you're like me, and you've glamourized in your mind how exciting it would be to work in one of these companies, perhaps you shouldn't watch this video...I'll leave that decision up to you...

BTW, I've finally added an email link so you can email me your questions and comments. I'll be sure to post the most creative.

Ellen Degeneres Infomercial Products

OK. I admit it. I LOVE Ellen! She's just one of those people that is naturally funny. She makes it look easy. I was watching her show a while back and saw a great review that she did on infomercial products. Watch it 'til the end. She has a great new invention that she came up with herself. In fact, if anyone can come up with a funnier invention, shoot me a photo or a video along with a quick description. I'll post the funniest one and pay you $100 bucks (clearly I'm not in the blogging business to make money...I just want to make you happy!). Check out Ellen's video:

Tiddy Bear

Some products are too good to be true....or at least too funny to be true. Luckily for me, the Tiddy Bear is a real product. It seems like a Saturday Night Live skit, but this product is real. You have to watch this ad. Let me know what you think:

ShamWOW!

"Made in Germany. You know the Germans always make good stuff!" Possibly my favorite line from a DRTV spot. I suppose if it were made in China, he would say, "Made in China, but it's not as bad as the rest of the crap they make over there." You've probably tried this product. If you're a true As Seen On TV Fan, then how could you have missed the ShamWOW phenomenon. The host is Vince Offer. He actually owns the company, and got his start hawking products at home shows and fairs across the country. Check out his bio on wikipedia: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vince_Offer

Billy Mays started the same way, so I guess he's in good company. The interesting thing is that the ShamWOW was a HUGE success where Billy Mays' identical product, Zorbeez, was lackluster. Check out this video spoof that compares the two ads. I guess Vince is the winner because he's just so lovable?

Yes, I did buy the ShamWOW. Yes, I tried it. But, I'm hesitant to share my review here. The ad was so good, that the product will continue to be a success, but I wasn't a huge fan of the product's performance. It picked up spills pretty well, but it wasn't as incredible as Vince makes it look. I actually prefer using microfiber towels that I picked up on QVC (I'll post the link as soon as I can find it...). I rate this product as a 5 out of 10. Better than paper towels, but not the best chamois product on the market.

There are literally thousands of spoofs of the ShamWOW spot...I searched long and hard, and this is the funniest I've found...ShamWOW in the Middle East:

A distant second place, but still entertaining. This is a more realistic depiction of how well the ShamWOW works. Warning, when you watch this video, try to look away from the guy's nose. I'm hoping that's some kind of weird piercing, but it looks more like something gross on his right nostril. Someday, I'll have the technology to edit that kind of stuff out.

I know you've seen the original ad, but to be consistent, I have to include it in my post. Many are calling this spot the best in the past decade. What do you think?